Consent to kids at heart of gay couple’s child support case

KANEOHE, Oahu — Attorneys for a divorced lesbian couple fighting over child support in a closely watched case agreed Thursday that consent to having a baby together is a crucial issue but disagreed over whether both spouses gave it.

A woman wants to sever her parental rights to a child her ex-wife gave birth to while she was deployed with the military and is asking the Hawaii Supreme Court to overturn a family court ruling denying that request.

The justices heard arguments Thursday and seemed troubled by considering consent. Associate Justice Sabrina McKenna said that could lead to treating same-sex couples differently from opposite-sex couples.

National gay rights advocates are watching how the dispute plays out, likely the first such case before a state Supreme Court, experts say.

The woman seeking to end her parental rights didn’t agree to her then-wife getting pregnant through a sperm donor, wasn’t there for the baby’s birth and never had a meaningful relationship with the child, her attorney, Rebecca Copeland, told the justices.

The dispute reflects the “changing landscape” of families in Hawaii, Copeland said, adding that the state’s laws need to change.

“They jointly made a choice as a married couple to bring him into this world,” argued Peter Renn of prominent LGBT-rights group Lambda Legal, which is representing the woman who gave birth.

When discussing consent, the justices explored a variety of hypothetical situations, including a woman who stops taking birth control without her husband’s knowledge and a man disputing his parental rights after finding out his wife had a child by having an affair with another man.

Chief Justice Mark Recktenwald said the court will issue a ruling later.